Best

My mornings generally start with meditation and prayer, but on one recent morning I mapped out my day before I started to meditate. I started out by allotting times for the topics for me to focus on, for the book-project I have. Before I started writing, I decided that I was going to do a food shop as I was dropping dinner off to some friends the following day. The plan was to go shopping, do some food prep and then be ready to write by 10am.

Then I got to my meditation and prayer and this whisper came to me, “Why are you giving away your best hours?” I was kinda taken aback by that because I knew it was in relation to the food shop. Of all things! Like, really?! As if it matters. The thing is, it does. It does matter. I wrestled with my thoughts for a few moments.

I’m an activator, I like to get things started, moving and done, but the problem with this is that I often do this at my own expense. My response in the moment was, “So I shouldn’t be generous and make dinner for my friends?!”. That was the wrong question. This wasn’t a matter of generosity. This was a matter of priority. After I scoffed at the whisper, I moved onto “But isn’t it selfish hold onto my best hours?” That’s my Achilles' heel.

Recently, I did a self-imposed assessment of myself. I was in a bit of a low place after an intense amount of stress—so sat down and had a chat...with myself. I said, “You need to stop giving everything 10 out of 10.” Now for a recovering perfectionist, that’s a tough call. But it was true—I put far too much pressure on myself to have everything done and right. It ends up getting my best and swallowing me whole. So, I determined what was going to get my best—what would get a 10 and in turn, what would get a 7. I wrote them down and made a commitment to prioritise.

In this instance, my writing had to get my 10.  Why? Because of obligations to a client, but more so—because it’s what I’m called to do. It’s schooling me and honing my craft and it’s paving the way for a career. And for me to get the best out of it, it needs my best—my best hours.  There are, today, more sevens in my life than there are tens. BUT the sevens and the tens give me energy, energy that is sustainable. And it turns out my friends don’t actually need dinner sorted by 10am.